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Public Fight Report

(Featherweight) Slim Boy Fat defeated Army of Dorkness 5 by unanimous decision: 115-112, 116-111, 115-112.

Match Wednesday, October 2, 2019

In this corner, standing 5 feet and 7 inches (170 centimeters) tall weighing in at 121 pounds (55 kilograms) is Slim Boy Fat!!

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 9 inches (145 centimeters) tall weighing in at 119 pounds (54 kilograms) is Army of Dorkness 5!!

The referee for this bout will be Richard Steele.

ROUND 1

Slim is backpedaling. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Dorkness 5 staggers Slim with a series of combinations to the mouth.
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+Slim hurts Dorkness 5 with a nice straight right to the head.
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+Slim throws a volley of painful punches to the mouth.
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+Dorkness 5 hurts Slim with an illegal kidney punch! The referee sees it and issues a warning!
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-Dorkness 5 charges with a jab to the jaw, but Slim ducks just in time.
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-Dorkness 5 attempts a barrage of right combinations to the mouth, but misses.
+Slim fires a flurry of quick punches to the head.
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+Dorkness 5 hits Slim with a volley of strong combinations to the nose! Slim shakes his head to clear it.
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+Dorkness 5 connects with a pair of mean combinations to the chin.
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+Slim drills Dorkness 5 with a series of wild punches to the chin. Dorkness 5 doesn't seem bothered.
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-Dorkness 5 probes with a right jab to the temple, but goes wide.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 22 of 24 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 17 of 30 punches.

Army of Dorkness 5 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 5 is winning the fight 10-9


Slim doesn't want to stop fighting!

Dorkness 5 doesn't want to stop fighting!



ROUND 2

Slim is backpedaling. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim takes charge with a series of hard punches to the chin.
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+Slim throws a volley of solid punches to the chin. Dorkness 5 retreats to the far corner.
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-Dorkness 5 throws a flurry of combinations to the ribs, but Slim takes it in the forearms.
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+Dorkness 5 pummels Slim with a barrage of vicious punches to the stomach.
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+Slim tattoos Dorkness 5 with a wild right to the face. Dorkness 5 sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
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+Dorkness 5 strikes with a flurry of combinations to the ribs.
+Dorkness 5 tosses a pair of glancing punches to the chest.
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-Slim charges with a series of left punches to the chin, but he's too slow.
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-Dorkness 5 lunges with a pair of left combinations to the chest, but Slim deftly avoits it.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 16 of 24 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 14 of 23 punches.

Army of Dorkness 5 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 5 is winning the fight 20-18


Slim doesn't want to stop fighting!

Dorkness 5 doesn't want to stop fighting!



ROUND 3

Slim is backpedaling. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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-Dorkness 5 lashes out with a volley of punches to the ribs, but Slim takes it in the forearms.
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+Slim hits with a right to the chin.
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-Dorkness 5 attempts a series of left punches to the solar plexus, but Slim narrowly avoids it
-Dorkness 5 probes with a flurry of combinations to the solar plexus, but Slim leaps aside.
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+Dorkness 5 punches Slim with a barrage of stiff combinations to the ribs.
-Slim attempts a pair of right combinations to the chin, but comes up empty.
+Slim attacks with a barrage of punches to the jaw.
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+Slim scores with a volley of furious punches to the jaw.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 19 of 27 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 12 of 25 punches.

Army of Dorkness 5 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 5 is winning the fight 30-27


Slim doesn't even want to rest!

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 4

Slim is using the ring. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim stuns Dorkness 5 with a flurry of punches to the eye. Dorkness 5 gets mad!
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+Slim annoys Dorkness 5 with a volley of nice punches to the face.
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+Dorkness 5 stuns Slim with a volley of furious combinations to the ribs. Slim laughs!
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+Slim connects with a jab to the head.
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+Dorkness 5 pummels Slim with a series of solid combinations to the stomach.
-Dorkness 5 throws a flurry of punches to the stomach, but Slim hides behind his gloves.
-Slim probes with a flurry of punches to the chin, but Dorkness 5 hides behind his gloves.
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-Dorkness 5 charges with a series of punches to the chest, but Slim leaps aside.
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+Slim lashes out with a pair of punches to the eye. Dorkness 5 retreats to the far corner.
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+Slim jars Dorkness 5 with a pair of commanding punches to the temple.
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-Slim probes with a series of punches to the jaw, but Dorkness 5 beats a hasty retreat.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 36 of 49 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 15 of 23 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 5 is winning the fight 39-37


Slim doesn't even want to rest!

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 5

Slim is using the ring. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

+Dorkness 5 suprises Slim with a light jab to the ribs.
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-Slim probes with a jab to the mouth, but goes wide.
+Slim pops Dorkness 5 with a barrage of stinging combinations to the mouth.
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-Dorkness 5 attacks with a series of left combinations to the ribs, but Slim steps aside.
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+Slim throws a pair of combinations to the jaw!
+Slim lands a left to the temple.
+Slim annoys Dorkness 5 with a barrage of combinations to the eye. Dorkness 5 asks for time to wipe off the blood.
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-Dorkness 5 paws a flurry of right punches to the solar plexus, but is ineffective.
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-Slim tries to land a pair of left combinations to the mouth, but Dorkness 5 stays away from it.
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-Slim lashes out with a volley of punches to the eye, but falls short.
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+Slim pokes Dorkness 5 with a quick roundhouse to the head!
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+Dorkness 5 punches Slim with a sweeping right to the chest.
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+Slim belts Dorkness 5 with a jab to the mouth.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 31 of 50 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 12 of 25 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 5 is winning the fight 48-47


Slim doesn't even want to rest!

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 6

Slim is using the ring. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Dorkness 5 throws a heavy jab to the chest.
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+Dorkness 5 pummels Slim with a barrage of hard combinations to the stomach.
-Slim lunges with a pair of punches to the mouth, but Dorkness 5 takes it in the forearms.
+Slim hurts Dorkness 5 with a strong jab to the temple.
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+Slim shakes Dorkness 5 with a loud jab to the mouth.
-Slim attempts a series of punches to the chin, but Dorkness 5 covers himself well.
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+Slim lands a series of nasty punches to the jaw!!
-Slim attempts a flurry of punches to the face, but loses his balance.
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+Slim fires a pair of glancing punches to the eye.
-Slim tries to land a volley of punches to the nose, but flails uselessly.
+Dorkness 5 fires a volley of strong combinations to the ribs. Slim shakes his head to clear it.
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-Dorkness 5 lashes out with a pair of punches to the stomach, but only hits air.
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+Slim thumps Dorkness 5 with a flurry of shots to the face. Dorkness 5 ignores it.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 29 of 48 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 16 of 24 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

This fight is too close to call.


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 7

Slim is using the ring. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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-Dorkness 5 throws a right straight right to the solar plexus, but only hits air.
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-Slim throws a volley of punches to the face, but misses completely.
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+Slim annoys Dorkness 5 with a flurry of nice punches to the temple.
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+Slim smashes Dorkness 5 with a flurry of vicious punches to the mouth.
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-Slim tries a series of punches to the jaw, but misses.
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+Dorkness 5 lands a series of wild punches to the stomach.
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+Dorkness 5 backs up Slim with a volley of combinations to the chest.
+Slim tags Dorkness 5 with a strong jab to the temple. Dorkness 5 sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
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-Dorkness 5 probes with a volley of combinations to the ribs, but misses completely.
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+Slim pounds Dorkness 5 with a series of punches to the temple.
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+Slim pops Dorkness 5 with a series of powerful punches to the face. Dorkness 5 laughs!
+Slim scores with a flurry of punches to the mouth.
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-Slim fires a volley of combinations to the chin, but Dorkness 5 escapes.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 34 of 48 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 14 of 22 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 67-66


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 8

Slim backpedals and jabs.
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

+Slim catches Dorkness 5 with a series of strong punches to the face.
+Slim tags Dorkness 5 with a volley of punches to the temple.
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+Slim thumps Dorkness 5 with a barrage of wild punches to the chin. Dorkness 5 hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
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-Dorkness 5 lashes out with a volley of punches to the chest, but he's too slow.
+Slim tags Dorkness 5 with a volley of quick punches to the temple!
+Slim suprises Dorkness 5 with a volley of strong combinations to the head.
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-Slim fires a barrage of left punches to the nose, but Dorkness 5 stays away from it.
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+Dorkness 5 pounds Slim with a barrage of furious combinations to the chest.
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-Dorkness 5 throws a barrage of right combinations to the solar plexus, but Slim takes it in the forearms.
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+Slim smacks Dorkness 5 with a volley of heavy combinations to the nose!!
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+Slim hits with a barrage of punches to the ribs.
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+Slim catches Dorkness 5 with a quick combination to the mouth! Dorkness 5 sneers "My grandmother can hit harder than that!"
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 40 of 47 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 9 of 24 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 77-75


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 9

Slim is backpedaling. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim thumps Dorkness 5 with a series of solid punches to the nose!
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-Dorkness 5 attacks with a jab to the ribs, but Slim stays away from it.
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+Dorkness 5 throws a series of furious combinations to the ribs. Slim sneers "Is that the best you can do?"
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-Dorkness 5 charges with a pair of punches to the ribs, but Slim narrowly avoids it
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 6 of 8 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 11 of 25 punches.

Army of Dorkness 5 won the round 10-9

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 86-85


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 10

Slim backpedals and jabs.
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim connects with a flurry of furious shots to the eye. Dorkness 5 gets mad!
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+Slim pummels Dorkness 5 with a flurry of punches to the eye. Dorkness 5 hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
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+Slim tosses a vicious jab to the stomach.
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+Slim connects with a strong right to the mouth.
+Slim tosses a pair of punches to the eye. Dorkness 5 is hurt!
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+Slim slams Dorkness 5 with a flurry of punches to the temple.
+Slim pokes Dorkness 5 with a flurry of punches to the stomach.
-Dorkness 5 tries a series of right punches to the stomach, but comes up empty.
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+Slim hits with a volley of punches to the solar plexus!
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-Dorkness 5 tries a pair of left combinations to the solar plexus, but comes up empty.
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+Dorkness 5 pokes Slim with a barrage of punches to the solar plexus.
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+Slim pokes Dorkness 5 with a series of glancing punches to the face.
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+Dorkness 5 lashes out with a commanding straight right to the stomach. Slim quickly recovers.
-Slim fires a pair of combinations to the chin, but Dorkness 5 narrowly avoids it
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 42 of 49 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 11 of 24 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-9

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 96-94


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 11

Slim is backpedaling. (using the ring)
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim lands a series of light punches to the mouth. Dorkness 5 hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
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-Dorkness 5 tries to land a right jab to the chest, but Slim backs out of it.
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-Dorkness 5 attempts a pair of combinations to the ribs, but Slim backs out of it.
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+Dorkness 5 nails Slim with a volley of nice combinations to the stomach. Slim asks for time to wipe off the blood.
-Dorkness 5 lunges with a combination to the solar plexus, but Slim stays away from it.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 6 of 8 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 9 of 22 punches.

Army of Dorkness 5 won the round 10-9

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 105-104


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 12

Slim backpedals and jabs.
Dorkness 5 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Slim belts Dorkness 5 with a flurry of punches to the eye. Dorkness 5 hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
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+Slim annoys Dorkness 5 with a flurry of stiff punches to the temple.
+Dorkness 5 pops Slim with a pair of furious combinations to the temple.
+Slim jolts Dorkness 5 with a jab to the nose! Dorkness 5 gets mad!
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+Dorkness 5 hits with Slim with a blow to the groin! The referee sees it and takes a point away!
+Slim hits Dorkness 5 with a series of powerful punches to the chest.
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+Slim lands a volley of furious punches to the head. Dorkness 5 hangs on until the referee breaks them up.
+Slim tags Dorkness 5 with a series of nasty punches to the ribs.
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-Dorkness 5 lunges with a series of left combinations to the nose, but to no avail.
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+Dorkness 5 tosses a pair of combinations to the head.
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+Slim jolts Dorkness 5 with a barrage of solid punches to the jaw.
+Slim lands a pair of punches to the jaw.
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+ The fighters exchange punches to the eye.
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+Slim wakes up the fans with a series of vicious punches to the head. Dorkness 5 sneers "Is that the best you can do?"
+Slim wallops Dorkness 5 with a pair of punches to the jaw!
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+Dorkness 5 attacks with a flurry of painful punches to the head.
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+Dorkness 5 attacks with a flurry of mean punches to the temple. Slim quickly recovers.
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-Dorkness 5 probes with a barrage of punches to the eye, but Slim ducks just in time.

BELL

According to the commentator:

Slim Boy Fat landed 44 of 46 punches, and Army of Dorkness 5 landed 19 of 40 punches.

Slim Boy Fat won the round 10-8

Slim Boy Fat is winning the fight 115-112


Slim remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Dorkness 5 doesn't even want to rest!




The judges decisions are:


Judge Guimond scores the fight as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 3: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 4: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 5: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 6: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 7: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 8: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 10: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 11: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 12: Slim Boy Fat 10-8

Total Score: Slim Boy Fat 115-112


Judge Leinbach scores the fight as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 3: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 4: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 5: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 6: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 7: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 8: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 10: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 11: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 12: Slim Boy Fat 10-8

Total Score: Slim Boy Fat 116-111


Roy Jones Jr scores the fight as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 2: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 3: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 4: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 5: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 6: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 7: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 8: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 9: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 10: Slim Boy Fat 10-9
Round 11: Army of Dorkness 5 10-9
Round 12: Slim Boy Fat 10-8

Total Score: Slim Boy Fat 115-112

Slim Boy Fat wins by decision!