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Public Fight Report

(Strawweight) ."Dana Dameson". defeated Army of Dorkness 1 by technical knockout (TKO) in round 2.

Match Monday, May 31, 2021

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 11 inches (150 centimeters) tall weighing in at 97 pounds (44 kilograms) is ."Dana Dameson".!!

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 5 inches (135 centimeters) tall weighing in at 86 pounds (39 kilograms) is Army of Dorkness 1!!

The referee for this bout will be Richard Steele.

ROUND 1

Dana Dameson backpedals and jabs.
Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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+Dorkness 1 wallops Dana Dameson with a series of punches to the face.
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+Dorkness 1 stuns Dana Dameson with a bite to the ear! The Ref mus be blind!
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-Dorkness 1 attacks with a left jab to the chin, but comes up empty.
+Dorkness 1 hits with a flurry of combinations to the temple.
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+Dorkness 1 pokes Dana Dameson with a loud sweeping right to the mouth.
-Dorkness 1 probes with a series of right punches to the head, but is ineffective.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

."Dana Dameson". landed 5 of 8 punches, and Army of Dorkness 1 landed 18 of 31 punches.

Army of Dorkness 1 won the round 10-9

Army of Dorkness 1 is winning the fight 10-9


Dana Dameson doesn't want to stop fighting!

Dorkness 1 is slowing down.



ROUND 2

Dana Dameson backpedals and jabs.
Dorkness 1 tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)

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-Dorkness 1 lunges with a barrage of shots to the ribs, but Dana Dameson narrowly avoids it
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-Dorkness 1 throws a volley of combinations to the solar plexus, but Dana Dameson ducks just in time.
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-Dorkness 1 attacks with a volley of punches to the stomach, but to no avail.
+Dana Dameson pummels Dorkness 1 with a barrage of strong punches to the solar plexus.
Dana Dameson lands a resounding right cross to the jaw and Dorkness 1 goes down!!

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NINE
Dorkness 1 struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
+Dana Dameson throws a hard cross to the chest. Dorkness 1 sneers "My little sister can hit harder than you!"
Dana Dameson lands a lightning left smash to the jaw and Dorkness 1's knees buckle -- he topples to the canvas!!

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FIVE
Dorkness 1 struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
+Dana Dameson tosses a flurry of punches to the chest.
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+Dana Dameson stuns Dorkness 1 with a painful left to the stomach. Dorkness 1 falls against the ropes! Dana Dameson strikes, and hits again, and again, and again .. Dorkness 1 starts to cry! The Referee stops the fight!
."Dana Dameson". wins by a Knock Out!!

BELL
Dana Dameson doesn't even want to rest!

Dorkness 1 can't remember which corner is his.






Judge Guimond had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9


Judge Leinbach had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9


George Foreman had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Army of Dorkness 1 10-9

."Dana Dameson". wins by a technical knockout!