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Public Fight Report

(Super-Lightweight) Pissy Panty Piss Drinker defeated Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale by knockout (KO) in round 12.

Match Thursday, April 26, 2018

In this corner, standing 4 feet and 11 inches (150 centimeters) tall weighing in at 84 pounds (38 kilograms) is Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale!!

In this corner, standing 5 feet and 9 inches (175 centimeters) tall weighing in at 139 pounds (63 kilograms) is Pissy Panty Piss Drinker!!

The referee for this bout will be Dalby Shirley.

ROUND 1

The Bruce tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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+The Bruce hits with Drinker with an elbow! The audience is howling!
-The Bruce fires a barrage of left punches to the face, but Drinker ducks just in time.
+The Bruce throws a volley of punches to the eye. Drinker retreats to the far corner.
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+Drinker shakes The Bruce with a flurry of punches to the nose! The Bruce beats a hasty retreat.
Drinker lands a slow motion uppercut and The Bruce drops like a stone!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE
The Bruce struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
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-The Bruce attempts a flurry of punches to the head, but Drinker hides behind his gloves.
-The Bruce lunges with a volley of punches to the eye, but Drinker hides behind his gloves.
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+Drinker grazes The Bruce with a jab to the nose.
-The Bruce attempts a flurry of combinations to the nose, but Drinker takes it in the forearms.
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The fighters study each other.
+Drinker hits The Bruce with a volley of loud shots to the face. The Bruce doesn't notice.
+Drinker hits with a flurry of punches to the eye.
-The Bruce launches a volley of right punches to the nose, but Drinker ducks.
+The Bruce grazes Drinker with a barrage of vicious punches to the chin.
+Drinker lashes out with a series of punches to the eye.
+The Bruce grazes Drinker with a volley of combinations to the mouth.
-The Bruce fires a series of right combinations to the jaw, but Drinker deftly avoits it.
-Drinker tries to land a volley of punches to the chin, but goes wide.
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The fighters start chatting with members of the press.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 10 of 40 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 25 of 31 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-8

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 10-8


The Bruce remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.

Drinker doesn't want to stop fighting!



ROUND 2

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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-The Bruce fires a barrage of left shots to the ribs, but loses his balance.
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-The Bruce attacks with a pair of right punches to the chest, but he's too slow.
+Drinker thumps The Bruce with a pair of punches to the head.
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-The Bruce attempts a flurry of left punches to the solar plexus, but Drinker deftly avoits it.
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-Drinker tries a flurry of punches to the face, but The Bruce deftly avoits it.
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+Drinker hits The Bruce with a flurry of mean punches to the jaw.
-Drinker throws a pair of left punches to the mouth, but misses.
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-Drinker probes with a series of right punches to the jaw, but is ineffective.
+Drinker fires a heavy jab to the temple!

BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 5 of 25 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 15 of 31 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 20-17


The Bruce grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 3

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is backpedaling. (using the ring)

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-The Bruce probes with a volley of punches to the chest, but Drinker steps aside.
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-The Bruce attacks with a pair of right punches to the solar plexus, but Drinker blocks.
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-The Bruce charges with a series of right punches to the solar plexus, but misses.
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-The Bruce launches a series of punches to the stomach, but Drinker quickly backs away.
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-The Bruce paws a volley of left punches to the chest, but is ineffective.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 24 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 5 of 8 punches.

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 29-27


The Bruce grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 4

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is backpedaling. (using the ring)

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-The Bruce paws a pair of left punches to the chest, but taps his opponent ineffectively.
-The Bruce lashes out with a right left to the solar plexus, but taps his opponent ineffectively.
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-The Bruce attempts a pair of left punches to the stomach, but Drinker ducks.
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-The Bruce charges with a pair of right punches to the ribs, but comes up empty.
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The fighters study each other.

BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 24 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 5 of 8 punches.

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 38-37


The Bruce grabs a water bottle and rests on his stool.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 5

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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+Drinker lands a volley of punches to the nose.
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+Drinker smacks The Bruce with a flurry of punches to the nose. The Bruce grimaces in pain.
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+Drinker wallops The Bruce with a barrage of punches to the ribs.
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-The Bruce tries to land a left to the chest, but comes up empty.
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-The Bruce throws a series of right punches to the stomach, but loses his balance.
-Drinker probes with a barrage of left punches to the jaw, but only hits air.
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-The Bruce attacks with a left jab to the ribs, but Drinker ducks just in time.
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-The Bruce launches a right left to the stomach, but Drinker hides behind his gloves.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 4 of 23 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 21 of 33 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 48-46


The Bruce is obviously tired.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 6

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is backpedaling. (using the ring)

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-The Bruce probes with a barrage of punches to the chest, but only hits air.
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-The Bruce tries to land a volley of left punches to the solar plexus, but Drinker takes it in the forearms.
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-The Bruce paws a pair of punches to the solar plexus, but Drinker leaps aside.
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-The Bruce lashes out with a barrage of punches to the ribs, but Drinker deftly avoits it.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 23 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 6 of 8 punches.

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 57-56


The Bruce is obviously tired.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 7

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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-The Bruce probes with a volley of right punches to the stomach, but flails uselessly.
-The Bruce lashes out with a series of punches to the solar plexus, but Drinker blocks.
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+Drinker pounds The Bruce with a jab to the nose.
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-Drinker throws a volley of right punches to the ribs, but The Bruce quickly backs away.
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+Drinker hits with a series of loud punches to the head. The Bruce sneers "My grandmother can hit harder than that!"
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+Drinker annoys The Bruce with a light straight right to the temple. The Bruce doesn't seem bothered.
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-The Bruce attempts a barrage of right punches to the stomach, but is ineffective.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 4 of 25 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 22 of 32 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 67-65


The Bruce is slowing down.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 8

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is backpedaling. (using the ring)

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+Drinker tattoos The Bruce with a series of punches to the chest.
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-The Bruce tries a series of left punches to the stomach, but Drinker narrowly avoids it
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-The Bruce attempts a barrage of punches to the stomach, but Drinker backs out of it.
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-The Bruce lunges with a series of punches to the ribs, but loses his balance.
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-The Bruce probes with a volley of right punches to the ribs, but Drinker backs out of it.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 2 of 26 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 6 of 8 punches.

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 76-75


The Bruce is slowing down.

Drinker doesn't even want to rest!



ROUND 9

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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+Drinker lands a series of shots to the nose.
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+Drinker connects with a series of punches to the head! The Bruce covers up.
+Drinker stuns The Bruce with a flurry of off balance punches to the mouth. The Bruce gets mad!
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+Drinker grazes The Bruce with a pair of punches to the solar plexus.
-The Bruce lunges with a volley of punches to the chest, but comes up empty.
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-Drinker attempts a series of left punches to the stomach, but goes wide.
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-The Bruce tries a flurry of left punches to the ribs, but Drinker ties him up.
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+Drinker hits with a pair of hard punches to the nose.
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-The Bruce attacks with a series of right punches to the chest, but Drinker escapes.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 23 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 22 of 34 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 86-84


The Bruce looks exhausted.

Drinker remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.



ROUND 10

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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+Drinker whacks The Bruce with a series of stinging punches to the eye.
-The Bruce tries a series of right punches to the face, but Drinker steps aside.
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-The Bruce probes with a pair of punches to the face, but Drinker ducks.
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-Drinker fires a pair of punches to the face, but The Bruce hides behind his gloves.
-Drinker attempts a flurry of punches to the eye, but only hits air.
-The Bruce throws a volley of right punches to the mouth, but he's too slow.
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+Drinker smacks The Bruce with a series of punches to the jaw. The Bruce laughs!
+Drinker clocks The Bruce with a straight right to the head.
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+Drinker pummels The Bruce with a barrage of light punches to the mouth. The Bruce laughs!
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 25 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 19 of 34 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 96-93


The Bruce looks exhausted.

Drinker remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.



ROUND 11

The Bruce is using the ring. (using the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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-Drinker lunges with a series of right punches to the jaw, but loses his balance.
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-The Bruce lashes out with a straight right to the face, but Drinker covers himself well.
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+Drinker pummels The Bruce with a series of punches to the face!!
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-Drinker throws a pair of punches to the nose, but The Bruce takes it in the forearms.
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+Drinker whacks The Bruce with a barrage of off balance punches to the eye.
-The Bruce paws a barrage of left punches to the solar plexus, but goes wide.
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+Drinker pummels The Bruce with a barrage of punches to the chin. The Bruce quickly recovers.
+Drinker hits The Bruce with a volley of punches to the mouth.
-The Bruce tries a pair of left punches to the face, but falls short.
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BELL

According to the commentator:

Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale landed 3 of 27 punches, and Pissy Panty Piss Drinker landed 21 of 33 punches.

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker won the round 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker is winning the fight 106-102


The Bruce collapses limply onto his stool.

Drinker remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.



ROUND 12

The Bruce tries to cut off the ring. (cutting off the ring)
Drinker is using the ring. (using the ring)

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+The Bruce punches Drinker with a series of painful combinations to the temple. Drinker retreats to the far corner.
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-The Bruce paws a flurry of combinations to the face, but to no avail.
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+Drinker connects with a flurry of stiff punches to the temple. The Bruce backpedals to his own corner.
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-The Bruce probes with a volley of right punches to the mouth, but Drinker steps aside.
+Drinker throws a volley of light punches to the head.
Drinker lands a blood spattering left blow to the temple and The Bruce falls to the canvas!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

SEVEN

EIGHT
The Bruce struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
-The Bruce probes with a flurry of left punches to the chin, but comes up empty.
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+Drinker shakes The Bruce with a series of punches to the temple. The Bruce beats a hasty retreat.
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-The Bruce probes with a barrage of combinations to the face, but Drinker ducks just in time.
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-The Bruce lunges with a series of combinations to the chin, but Drinker ducks just in time.
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+Drinker wakes up the fans with a commanding sweeping right to the chin.
+Drinker takes charge with a volley of mean combinations to the chin.
Drinker lands a mighty cross to the jaw and The Bruce is knocked down!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

SEVEN
The Bruce struggles to his feet and the fight goes on.
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-The Bruce launches a volley of left blows to the face, but Drinker escapes.
+Drinker shakes The Bruce with a pair of punches to the face.
Drinker lands a thundering left haymaker and The Bruce drops like a stone!!

ONE

TWO

THREE

FOUR

FIVE

SIX

SEVEN

EIGHT

NINE

TEN
He's Out!
Pissy Panty Piss Drinker wins by a Knock Out!!

BELL
The Bruce can't remember which corner is his.

Drinker remains standing while the trainer wipes him down.






Judge Guimond had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-8
Round 2: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 3: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 4: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 5: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 6: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 7: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 8: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 9: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 10: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 11: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9


Judge Leinbach had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-8
Round 2: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 3: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 4: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 5: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 6: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 7: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 8: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 9: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 10: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 11: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9


Oscar De La Hoya had the fight scored as follows:

Round 1: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-8
Round 2: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 3: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 4: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 5: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 6: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 7: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 8: Robert "The Bruce" Scottish Ale 10-9
Round 9: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 10: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9
Round 11: Pissy Panty Piss Drinker 10-9

Pissy Panty Piss Drinker wins by a knockout!